Lost
by dannyboymw
Summary: Mustang is lost. Can he be found? Hey guys! sapphireswimming took the first chapter of this story and rewrote it, making it better. She is an excellent author with creative vision and outstanding writing skills. Check it out here: /s/11540371/1/In-Memoriam
1. Chapter 1

**LOST Part 1**

It was five days since the encounter with Lust; Lieutenant Havoc was still doing poorly and would remain in the hospital for a while longer. Colonel Roy Mustang, however, felt quite recovered and was already contriving multiple plans of escape.

"With Havoc beside me, I could send notes to the Lieutenant through his daily cigarette deliveries. No - he'd probably forget and burn it. I could hide, and when the doctor comes in to check on me, I'll knock him out and make a run for it. That shouldn't be too difficult."

"It's just a thought, Colonel, but maybe you should keep your plans of escape to yourself, instead of thinking out loud where, possibly, anyone could hear you." It was Havoc, but Mustang was too engrossed looking for a hiding place to give him any notice. As he was thinking, the door opened and Riza Hawkeye, Mustang's aide, walked in.

"Lieutenant, I'm glad to see you. You have got to get me out of here," was the Colonel's greeting.

Hawkeye tossed him a pair of clothes she had brought from his house. Roy caught them in surprise. He was shocked that his subordinate had found the keys he thought he had cleverly hidden under the door mat. "Follow me," she said, free of any emotion.

There was no explanation as to how she had done it, only that she had. Mustang was returning to normal life once more. He was astounded. Even in his dreams he could not have imagined it would be so simple.

They were both silent as they walked out of the room and into the hall. Mustang wanted to ask his subordinate 'How?' but he refrained from asking unnecessary questions. He knew that she would not have answered him in either case. Mustang watched Hawkeye from behind as they went on their way. For a moment he was entranced by her golden hair as it swept from side to side with each progressive step. As they entered the hospital lobby, Riza spoke for the first time since she gave Mustang his clothes.

"Wait here; I'll get the car" she said.

"I would prefer to walk tonight." She looked at him with uncertainty. "Sitting is all I have been doing for the last week," he explained.

For a long time Riza said nothing, just looked in his eyes as if he were trying to deceive her. At last she let out a brief sigh.

"Very well, on the condition that I drive beside you."

"Agreed." It wasn't quite the freedom he had hoped for, but it would have to suffice. On the other hand, his time in the hospital had limited the time he was able to spend with his lieutenant. No. This is better than walking alone.

Hawkeye turned and walked to pick up the car. Mustang waited for her in the lobby. As she left, Riza realized she had forgotten to inform the Colonel of Scar's reappearance. _He will be okay,_ she thought, _it is not like Scar to attack in public_.

Mustang began walking when the car came into sight, and the vehicle matched his walking speed.

"Are you sure this is wise, Sir? Scar is still at large."

Without missing a beat, Roy responded, "I've got you watching my back, remember. He wouldn't dare try anything."

"What is the next move, Colonel? Now that we know the true identity of the Fuhrer, it should not be too difficult to convince other high ranking officers of their peril."

"What we say means nothing. It would take a hell of a lot of influencing to persuade the Military Council of the enemy's true intentions, wild as they seem. Besides, how are we to be sure they are not part of the plot?"

"I see..."

"Colonel Roy Mustang?" A voice emerged from the darkness of a near alley. It was cold and carried with it, an unmistakable intent to kill.

"Colonel!" Hawkeye reached for her gun and shot in a moment, but it was a moment too late.

Colonel Mustang turned in time to see a hand lurch towards his face and he knew it was Scar. Having just gotten out of the hospital, he had no need of his Alchemic gloves. They were always kept by the First Lieutenant for safe-keeping. Well, he could not damn well get them now. He had no choice; it was over. For a moment, Roy felt a surge of power rush through his head. From all he had heard, Mustang did not think that death by Scar's hand would feel that way. Then all went black.

* * *

With a jerk, he shot into a sitting position. He still had coherent thoughts. That must mean... _I am alive?_ He opened his eyes. It was not gradual as he had expected. With no warning at all the world flooded his vision, and his eyes hurt from the sudden glare of light as they dampened with his tears. The first thing that he saw was a woman sitting beside him. She was dressed in a military uniform, with blonde hair held up in the back.

The woman stood up in a flash and saluted.

"First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye pleased to see the Colonel alive, Sir."

The Colonel was still confused from the shock of being killed, but he did know one thing. He tried to say, but he was unable to translate his thoughts into words. All that passed through his lips were incoherent mumblings.

Hawkeye was taken aback and her eyes went wide with terror and grief. The Colonel was the only person to survive an attack from Scar. It was a miracle he was alive. In any case, the situation was shocking. _Shocking._ When Hawkeye recalled the moment Scar appeared, she remembered that he did have a grip on the Colonel's head. _Perhaps, with the limited time, the attack was not enough to kill, but enough to do significant damage to the brain._

Over the next couple of months, Mustang was taught the basics. He was told his name, rank in the military, and then what had happened between him and Scar. By the end of the third week he had no difficulty in simple speech, and by the middle of the second month, his coordination had returned to what it was. The next subject was the basic understanding of the world and the different countries.

During these many weeks, Colonel Roy Mustang observed Riza Hawkeye's actions. When he was finally able to, he asked her.

"Lieutenant. Did I know you... from before? You see, I have been watching you, and, although you are not in a uniform, you seem to be the more dedicated than any nurse here."

The Lieutenant was heartbroken by the turn of events. With just the brief moment to contemplate these words Riza replied, "the Colonel is my commanding officer and my direct superior." She did her best not to let her emotions interfere with her voice, but for all her efforts, a slight quiver affected the end of her sentence, but soon got a grip on herself. No tear fell from her eyes until after she had returned to her apartment later that evening.

* * *

"There is something more, isn't there?"

"Sir?"

"You told me yesterday that your dedication is a result of loyalty to rank. There is something else. What is it?"

"You were a good man and a good leader. Every subordinate respects you. You genuinely care for your men, and in times of need you always found a way out. Now that you are injured, I feel it is the least I can do to help you recover."

"I see." There was silence for a while. "I am sorry. It must be strange to see one man fall unconscious and watch a different man awake."

 _Strange? Even 'painful' is an extreme understatement._

The door creaked open and everyone rose to attention.

"Word reached me that the Flame Alchemist was recovering from an encounter with Scar. Incredible on many levels."

"By your uniform, it is apparent that you are important," said Mustang, "and so why you would take any interest in me?"

"I will personally conduct the Colonel's reeducation from here on out." With that, Fuehrer Bradley turned and walked out of the room.


	2. Chapter 2

**LOST Part 2**

"This country was built for something greater" said the Fuhrer. Mustang's re-education had begun in earnest, and he never had time to spare to see Havoc, Fury, or Breda - not even Hawkeye or Ed. "Have you heard of the city Xerxes? There was one man in that city who desired to see god. Through hard research, careful calculations, and many experiments, he reached his goal and learned the truth, he saw the face of god. But there was a cost."

"Did he perish?"

"No, as a result of his sin, the people of the entire country were forced to surrender their souls to the divine being who entered into their midst."

"That's horrible."

"He walks amongst us still, but in human form so his loving kindness is more readily seen by all without consequences. But there are those who refuse to accept his love. It is said that the day will come when he will reveal himself to all people and punish those who to not believe."

"What of the man who doomed the entire city?"

"He was made to wonder the earth with an immortal soul and reflect upon what he had done in eternal torment."

Mustang thought for a moment. He was troubled, and yet the Fuhrer had done so much for him already.

* * *

"How can you even think such heresies?"

"Please, Sir, you must believe us"

"Why should I trust you?"

"You mean more to us than just a superior; we are your friends."

"Well, right now, I feel more like you are trying to take advantage of my situation."

"You are being used, Sir, but not by us."

"Bradley is the Fuhrer, he doesn't need me to gain power or wealth."

"If our ambitions were so great, why would we spend our resources, and put everything at risk, over one man?"

"You have done so much for me, I want to believe you are my friends. Prove to me that I can trust you."

"You have to have faith."

"It's not enough." There was pain in his heart-wrenching cry as though he knew he ought to believe the woman pleading with him - a pause.

The tears which had built up within Hawkeye could no longer be contained and broke free. She had never once so much as uttered the word since her father died, but she didn't know what else to do. "... you loved me once" There was an even longer pause - each wondering what the other was thinking.

Mustang was conflicted. What difference would it make if he once loved this woman, he is no longer the same. However, he needed to know. "Was it returned?"

There was no longer any need for hesitation, it had all been said. "It was."

"Then if you love me still, I beg you, do not force my hand where it is mine to move. This has to be my choice. I promise that I will give careful thought to what you have told me, but I need time."

"Of course, Sir. Forgive me." The Lieutenant turned and left the room, leaving the Colonel with brooding thoughts and a heavy head. Uncertain.

* * *

The time had now come to test Mustang's Alchemy - the final trial. Until now, it had only been him and the Fuhrer, but now it seemed that the entire military council was present. Something about all of their stone cold faces watching his every move with discerning criticism made the Colonel uneasy. This stage in his rehabilitation was important-he knew that- but still, because of the ceremony devoted to this moment, Mustang couldn't help but feel as though his only value was the ability to produce flesh scorching flames at will. _How detestable. How... inhuman._ He had no sooner thought this, when Mustang was presented pure white gloves decorated with circular designs he could not decipher. It was clear that he was to put them on. Direct the attack towards the dummy and produce a spark with my fingers using the gloves? Simple enough. He pointed with his index finger and snapped. It seemed as though time had slowed down. It only took a few seconds, but it felt as though it had been 60. There was a murmur among the generals. Had he missed something? As he focused on the dummy, Mustang noticed that it suffered no damage. What went wrong? Was it nerves? He was sweating now. There was doubt as to whether the Colonel even wanted to work for those who now watched him, but something told him that he needed to impress them or there would be consequences. He tried again, his fingers slipped, disabling him from producing anything but embarrassment. Again. Again. This time the room filled and echoed with the loudest snap anyone had ever heard. Until it died out that was all anyone heard, and silence followed.

The Flame Alchemist had failed Assessment Day.

* * *

Bradley stopped visiting after that day. It had been a week now and Mustang's sole companionship was found in his subordinates: Breda, Fury, Havoc, even Ed came by once (under the duress of Al), but most importantly - Hawkeye. He had become fond of Hawkeye and understood why they loved each other before. Secretly, he hoped to return to that level of attachment. But the Colonel was not about to admit that to anyone, let alone her-even though he had an inkling that she knew how he felt. Something about that woman made him think that she knew his every thought. It was as though they were connected.

"I owe you an apology, Lieutenant."

"Sir?" She pretended not to know what he was referring to, even though they both knew that she did.

"Earlier, you tried to warn me about the Fuhrer's real motive for helping me. I still do not understand all about the Homunculus, but it is clear that he only wanted me for my alchemy. He does not care for me as a person, let alone an officer."

"I was being impertinent. Again, I apologize."

"You were protecting me. That is what you do with people whom you love."

Hawkeye would have blushed, but she pushed it aside. Although she did not show any emotion, she was truly touched and relieved by the recent turn of events. _Is it possible? Can things go back to how they were?_ "It is still no excuse for my behavior."

"If you keep insisting on apologizing, you'll grow soft and start showing weakness. If what you say is true, I'll need you at your best."

* * *

"It is useless," Bradley stood before Father. "Mustang has lost his Alchemic prowess. It is unlikely that he will prove useful to our plans. How shall I proceed?"

"The Flame Alchemist may yet prove useful. There may be a way for his memory to be restored. Perhaps he just needs to see the Truth. Carry out your duty my son."

* * *

"Goodnight Colonel. I will visit again tomorrow."

"I look forward to it, Lieutenant."

Mustang completed his evening rituals and laid himself down on his mattress, eagerly awaiting slumber - the sooner he fell asleep, the sooner he could see Hawkeye again. He had not quite achieved full sleep, when he was vaguely aware of his door opening, but he was just enough asleep that he was unable to pay it any heed. As Mustang drifted in and out of slumber, he was under the impression that he was being carried somewhere. What is that smell? Am I underground? ...sleep... Sewers perhaps. Why would I be in the sewers?...sleep, now... Is this stone? And why am I lying on it? It's cold... don't worry about it now, sleep.

"Is the circle prepared?" Mustang did not know this voice.

"I am curious as to what price he will pay." These were the last words he heard. They were Bradley's... sleep-tomorrow I will see Hawkeye.

The Colonel Opened his eyes to see a woman. Blonde. Beautiful. Uniform. Happy. Smile. "Hello there," he said. "How beautiful you look. What is your name?"

Frown. Why is she frowning?


End file.
